This site is intended to express my love for my son whom I lost in a custody battle. I have not seen my son's smile, heard his voice, smelled his hair, kissed his forehead, or hugged his pain since 2021.

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Dear son,

I want you to know that your perception is reality. Much of what your father has told you is a lie. You are becoming a young man now. You don't know a lot of what lead up to the things that have happened in your life. And you may never know, especially if you only listen to your father's story. He is very convincing and has fooled many. Your father did not want me to divorce him and threatened me around 2015 if I did that would never see you again. And I have proof. I broke his heart and he did what he had to to take you from me. And 2021, his manifestation became real. I never gave up custody of you. Your father has lied to everyone, including you, and has made everyone believe a made up story that matches his delusion. You are smart and by now, you will have noticed the mask he puts on. Your lawyer told the judge I should not have contact with you. He also said you don't want contact with me. And your father orchestrated it all. I was forced to sign my rights away. Your father only allows you to be around weak-minded adults who believe his story, including some from my side of the family. Other people from my side of the family have tried to contact you, but because they do not side with him, he has blocked them as well. Since I lost custody, I have tried to call you simply to say I love you and he has refused and blocked me. I have tried to send you things. I have tried to wish you a happy birthday. I have contacted over 20 lawyers since I lost contact with you in order to get some sort of contact with you, and because of the lies your father has told, no one will represent my case. Your father made it so I am not legally allowed to contact you in any way, shape or form. No lawyer will represent me in court to even try to get phone calls with you. I have exhausted all avenues to be in your life again. I will no longer make any attempts. You can thank your father.

It took me a long time, but I've accepted there is a good chance your father has convinced you that you are better off without me in your life. Everything I did as your mother was to try to raise you in the right way. When you are older you will understand. If you ever want your mother in your life, when you are 14, you will have 100% of the sayso in the matter. But you will have to contact a lawyer yourself. They will find me and I will pay for it. Your father will try to stop you or scare you or threaten you. And the weak-minded people he keeps around you will support him. Don't live in fear of him like I did for so long. You have your mind. You create the story of your life and no one else. And if you don't want me in your life, to God be the glory. In the mean time son, there is a God in heaven Who loves you. Pray to him and He will save you if you ever need it. I love you always.